It's been awhile, but a new skill has come to me. In honor to the snows of winter, I'd like to pay a small tribute to the art of sledding.
Short Beginnings:
Sled where at first used by Native Americans to move heavy things long distances. These sleds where usually pulled by a team of dogs (like what the Natives used in Alaska) or pulled by humans. Most sleds today are for recreation, but some traditional races still exist for the original purpose such as the annual 1,100 mile Iditarod. The most famous sleds are used in the Olympics as bobsleds (referencing the bobbing motion that the runners take to increase their speed in the beginning of their race). These sleds usually feature an in-cased chassis and a steering system.
Skills:
There are many techniques to sledding, most importantly though, is not how you go down, but how you go up. Observe the slope, find the steepest part with the most bumps that is iced over. Find that place and keep it locked in your head. Head to the very beginning of the descent and wait.
With a traditional long rectangle shaped sled that has a great directional speed but no spin and little steering.
Method 1: The all original boring-man's position when you sit up right and slowly fall down the mountain. Preferably screaming like a girl and crying.
Method 2: "The Stack" is my personal favorite of any way of sledding. A great way to get many people down a hill quickly, you first get a sturdy, long sled and put the heaviest and strongest person on the bottom. Then you put more and more people on top of that person and ride down the hill. You will start off slow, but end up at speeds of at least mach 2. This is fun, because if only one person starts to wobble, the whole stack save the base will tumble and bail. Usually, a very awkward position too, because you're all laying on top of each other too... Also, beware base, it will hurt...
Method 3: "The Raft" is a move where you get many sleds of any kind and lock arms side by side for as wide as you can then all ride down, eventually, you will drift apart or fall off(depending on the hill), but it is a great way to sled, because it's like a show down to see who has the best dexterity.
Method 4: "The Train" is a popular sledding technique, where you all line up and connect legs to arms and create a mega-bobsled-type sled that acts like a snake or roller coaster that is always pushing behind you. The Train is good for big groups, because you all will do the same thing and have the same amount of fun.
Method 5: "The Couple" technique is sledding form, where one person sits in the back of the sled and faces forward with spread legs and the other sits at the front facing backward, wrapping each other's legs around each other. This is great, because neither of you know where you're going and neither of you can see anything but each other's face which is very fun, cause one of you will likely freak out, or if you're a Sir, have a polite conversation with each other in a heroic pose of understanding and depth.
Method 6: "Dare Devil" is the style of sledding in a reckless fashion, where you lay down on your back, head facing the front of the sled and you close your eyes. A dangerous way of sledding where anything could happen, you could hit the cute little 6 year old, painfully come down on your head after a jump, or accidentally bail and hit a tree. This Dare Devil sledding is a thrill that is hard to match and can be repeated by laying on your stomach facing backwards.
With a saucer sled that has absolutely no control of any kind and can get really fast.
Method 1: The traditional style of sitting upright and sliding down the slope at a very fast pace, likely spinning, turning and spitting blood when you hit the concrete of the street.
Method 2: "The Spinner" is a way of starting the decline. You first start up the initial momentum, then you start spinning yourself in a circle until you get to about 40 rpm. This is hard to not bail on, because you'll be dizzy and will likely do a barrel-roll to safety.
Method 3: "The Brothers" is when you get together your homies or bros or brahs or sisters or whoever and lock your guys' sleds together by having them grab your saucer and grabbing theirs. This intertwines you together and you fly down the hillside and end up somewhere, but together like bros.
Method 4: "The Scary Driver" can be performed by leaning on your lower back and spreadeagleding yourself so you have the best of both worlds, an intense workout and a fun slide.
These methods are great ways to have fun in the winter, but watch your surroundings, there are trees out there and there are drop offs. But most importantly, watch out for the concrete of streets and parking lots. If you don't, you'll end up like me yesterday, sliding down a hill in "The Couple" formation with my friend Jessie when we swerve off course and I, being in the front facing backwards, can only see her face screaming when we bail on the packed up snow shoveled away from the parking lot and end up sliding a little bit until I end up under her parked car and she ends up, luckily still on the snow.
Be careful and watch out, but remember to have fun. Winter only comes once a year.
PS. In character with the observer, likely you'll be using this to get away with your friend at the top of a mountain on a piece of plywood whilst a mad scientist is chasing you with a pack of dogs and a Glock.
-The Observer
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